Asperger's Roller Coaster

The Asperger's roller coaster of life has hit the Rebel family again.

The last few weeks of Olly's primary schooling was extremely difficult. He had lots of plays to do and what with all the impending change at primary school and the change to senior school in September, it all got too much for him.

He freaked out big time.

This particular incident was shocking - even for me! I thought I had seen everything, but I was mistaken.

I am too ashamed to write a description of the incident. But zero tolerance is exhibited in any country or culture of an incident of this nature. I was appalled enough to threaten him with the police and social services to get him removed from our home. And if it happens again, I will call them.

Sometimes I am at my wits end. You do your absolute best, to try to be a good mother, to raise a child to be a good, law-abiding adult, to lead a happy and successful life, but when a child is on the Autistic Spectrum, quite frankly, you have your work cut out.

I feel like I keep banging my head against a brick wall.

You do all this work, attend appointments, ASC Support groups, get the diagnosis, get a good school for him, get him surrounded by people who, (supposedly), understand him and basically work your bloody arse off in doing what is best for him (and your life becomes his life), then he goes and does something that he could go to prison for. Asperger's Syndrome or no Asperger's Syndrome.

Sometimes I feel like I'm fighting for a lost cause.

Over the last four weeks I have walked on egg-shells for him. Pussy-footed around him, just to get through the last week or so of school. I have bend over backwards trying to keep peace and harmony around him, so he can get through this difficult time and I have never worked so hard in my life!

Even when I had three jobs and studied, nothing is quite as exhausting as Olly.

You would think that he would be happy now, with no school to go to? Well he isn't. He is miserable. A miserable git!

He is attending a holiday club, just in the afternoons for 2 weeks. It barely equates to 3 hours a day. I drop him off late and pick him up early, just so I can do my chores - shopping or house cleaning or some other monotonous crap!

He seems to think I have a 'jolly' time without him, that I kick up my heels, go dancing, or that he is missing out on something. I have to give him a full description of my 3 hours when I pick him up!

It beggars belief!!!!

And the miserableness is catching..........I cried today because he just stomps around, crashing things about, moaning, always looking like a great thunder cloud is hanging over his head (he has that dark, moody look) and the continual and habitual arguing with his sister.............Its enough to drive a sane person mad and take to the hills!

However, instead of running for the hills, I have booked a day out tomorrow in London with Hubby and the kids to try to lift morale.

Hopefully, the Asperger's roller coaster will level out slightly. We can but live in hope!

Asperger's Roller Coaster