Bright Idea

God! What a crappy day yesterday was.......I feel as miserable as this relentless rain we've been subjected to. Eight days of drizzle......EIGHT, with intermittent fleeting intervals of sun, hail and gale force winds.

I had the bright idea of doing a bit of Christmas shopping....physically....not virtually....I also had another bright idea of taking the bus, because it is bound to be more convenient and green etc, etc, etc.

I am a FOOL!

And this is why.....

1. All Bus stops are all 'out of order' in Brighton's City Centre (Why? Just to inconvenience shoppers and bugger up your day).

2. I was dropped off about a mile away and had to drudge back to the shops up a really steep hill in a bad temper.

3. Went into a book shop and set off all the alarms. I was interrogated like a common criminal. After much indignant yelling I was let go.

4. After sticking up my nose, I stomped out of the shop and spent what little money I had in other shops.

5. Finally trudged back to the bus stop, loaded down with shopping bags.

6. Where's the frigging bus stop gone?

7. Bus stop had moved half a mile up the road. Dragged feet and bags to make-shift bus stop, which was unfortunately outside a shop that was being renovated.

8. Builder's van pulls up and burly inconsiderate white van driver tells everyone in the make-shift bus queue to move along as they were clearing out the shop.

9. I grumbled loudly whilst complying.

10. My ears where then viciously assaulted by lumps of concrete being slung into back of the van.

11. Lost my temper completely and yelled at the builders calling them a 'bunch of 'fu**ing to**ers'.

12. The builders laughed.

13. Stomped off down the road, juggling bags and lit a ciggy.

14. Then torrential rain poured down. My soggy ciggy was thrown to the floor unsmoked. My paper Primark bag got so drenched it disintegrated, spilling the contents of my shopping all over the pavement.

15. No b'stard bothered to help me. They just stood and stared whilst the builders continued to laugh.

16. When the bus finally came, I soaked to my knickers.

17. The bus driver was an aspiring rally driver and when my bus stop came into sight, he took the corner at about 50 miles an hour and sent me sprawling across two empty seats.

18. My shopping went flying again and I held everybody up from getting off the bus trying to gather them up.

19. This attracted the attention of some madman/tramp on the bus who then waffled on in an incoherent drunken manner about bad bus drivers.

20. Having shaken off the tramp, finally arrived home. I was trying to make a cup of tea when I tripped over my Hubby's laptop lead which was trailing around the kitchen. I broke the lead and almost broke my sodding neck!

Hubby's answer to this day of hell was 'Do you have any more Bright Ideas?'

Bright Idea