Friday, 27 November 2009

Bright Idea


God! What a crappy day yesterday was.......I feel as miserable as this relentless rain we've been subjected to. Eight days of drizzle......EIGHT, with intermittent fleeting intervals of sun, hail and gale force winds.

I had the bright idea of doing a bit of Christmas shopping....physically....not virtually....I also had another bright idea of taking the bus, because it is bound to be more convenient and green etc, etc, etc.

I am a FOOL!

And this is why.....

1. All Bus stops are all 'out of order' in Brighton's City Centre (Why? Just to inconvenience shoppers and bugger up your day).

2. I was dropped off about a mile away and had to drudge back to the shops up a really steep hill in a bad temper.

3. Went into a book shop and set off all the alarms. I was interrogated like a common criminal. After much indignant yelling I was let go.

4. After sticking up my nose, I stomped out of the shop and spent what little money I had in other shops.

5. Finally trudged back to the bus stop, loaded down with shopping bags.

6. Where's the frigging bus stop gone?

7. Bus stop had moved half a mile up the road. Dragged feet and bags to make-shift bus stop, which was unfortunately outside a shop that was being renovated.

8. Builder's van pulls up and burly inconsiderate white van driver tells everyone in the make-shift bus queue to move along as they were clearing out the shop.

9. I grumbled loudly whilst complying.

10. My ears where then viciously assaulted by lumps of concrete being slung into back of the van.

11. Lost my temper completely and yelled at the builders calling them a 'bunch of 'fu**ing to**ers'.

12. The builders laughed.

13. Stomped off down the road, juggling bags and lit a ciggy.

14. Then torrential rain poured down. My soggy ciggy was thrown to the floor unsmoked. My paper Primark bag got so drenched it disintegrated, spilling the contents of my shopping all over the pavement.

15. No b'stard bothered to help me. They just stood and stared whilst the builders continued to laugh.

16. When the bus finally came, I soaked to my knickers.

17. The bus driver was an aspiring rally driver and when my bus stop came into sight, he took the corner at about 50 miles an hour and sent me sprawling across two empty seats.

18. My shopping went flying again and I held everybody up from getting off the bus trying to gather them up.

19. This attracted the attention of some madman/tramp on the bus who then waffled on in an incoherent drunken manner about bad bus drivers.

20. Having shaken off the tramp, finally arrived home. I was trying to make a cup of tea when I tripped over my Hubby's laptop lead which was trailing around the kitchen. I broke the lead and almost broke my sodding neck!

Hubby's answer to this day of hell was 'Do you have any more Bright Ideas?'


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16 comments:

  1. Brilliant. It's so nice to hear when other people's days turn to sh1t - but in a good way!
    Cheered me up. x

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  2. I'm not surprised the builders laughed. Funning Toppers indeed.
    Have a great day!

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  3. You need a Thanksgiving holiday break with lots of yummy food!! The holiday gets you into the Christmas spirit.

    The weather is also cold and dreary in Ohio. We had some snow flakes today that mostly melted due to the ground still be warm.

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  4. Am I allowed to laugh - sorry, but this was so funny. It does sound like "one of those days", the ones where you wish it was the next day.

    Have a lovely weekend....!!

    CJ xx

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  5. Oh god! Now you've gone and remined me that I still need to 'start' my christmas shopping! And s**t! what have they done with the bus stops? I was going to use the bus instead of the car, but not if they've hidden them somewhere. What an awful day you had. One best forgotten probably...Did you get everything you needed, so that at least it was worth all the hassle??

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  6. OMG i haven't put my bum on a bus since college and it will stay that way. What a hellish day you had and not helped by the crappyness of public transport. If my hubby had said that to me i would have whacked hom round the chops with my soggy bags lol! next time take a car or the train NO BLOODY BUSES!!! XXXXX

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  7. Do you know, some days are so crap that if we knew what lay ahead of us we wouldn't get out of bed in the morning.

    Sorry it was so bad, hope things improve for you. x

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  8. I have to agree that was a terrible day, horrible bus trip, but at least you did some shopping done.And that was such a bad day that you should be heading up, things can't get much worse now.

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  9. But apart from that, it didn't sound too bad? Just one thing though... How can a bus-stop be out-of-order? Do the lights go out? Is the door stuck? Or does it refuse to flush?!

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  10. Ah, don't give up - one of your bright ideas will turn up trumps... great post !

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  11. Brighton buses drive me mental! They are a million times worse in the rain, packed and all steamed up and just horrendous.

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  12. Ah, not the nest day then? Your post did make me laugh though, if it makes you feel any better! Hope you made a massive G&T straight away. Never fails to lift my spirits! HCM x

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  13. God, I've had many days like this- hilarious in the retelling, but sooooooo not at the time!!! Looking forward to reading your blog :)

    Rachelx
    (Strange & Beautiful)
    Thanks for the follow :)X

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  14. Yeah!!! I can comment today. Sometimes internet explorer will not let me comment in embedded comment sections. I tried to yesterday = fail.

    Sorry you had such a day...sending a cocktail your way. You need one.

    Hope the rest of the weekend was much, much better.

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  15. You've had a makeover in my absence! This is why I never get the bus aka loser cruiser xxxx

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  16. I would like to thank you for sharing your thoughts and time into the stuff you post!! Thumbs up



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