Saturday, 26 September 2009

Death and Taxes

Forgive me for not posting or commenting, but this week started off truly awful with nothing less than a 'Witch Hunt', then it peaked to dizzying heights with dear Olly coming up trumps (that kid never ceases to amaze me and I will write a post about it soon - I'm so proud of him), and now we have been plunged back into such depths of despair that is beyond belief.

It has been just one thing after another this week, but this latest tragedy is just simply appalling.

My Hubby's sister's husband, Roger, was the kindest, jolliest and loveliest of men. At 6ft 6" by 6ft 6", he was a towering giant of man, with a gentle, sensitive soul. Jolly Roger we used to call him. He doted on the kids, he didn't have children of his own so they used to spoil Olly and Amber something rotten.

One afternoon this week, he drove into a large UK city and parked his car at the top of a multi-storey car park and threw himself off. He plunged 70ft onto a busy main road and was then hit by a double-decker bus!

Did the bus come along just to make sure that the 'job' was done?

It is almost laughable. What kind of a cruel joke is this? Another one of Life's twists and turns?

Needless to say we are shocked and devastated and Hubby's poor sister is beside herself with grief. To make matters worse it was captured on CCTV footage, however, because of the footage, the police have declared it a suicide, although this was so out of character.

I was unable to tell the kids that their Uncle committed suicide, so I have told them it was a heart attack.

The local papers have even reported the death. There are rivers of tears streaming through this house and up north too (where Hubby's family is from). I have yet to cry. I feel numb with shock. My family need me to keep things ticking over, keep the routines going, so that is what I am doing. Olly appears to be coping very well, although Amber is a bit of a wreck.

Some 'wit' whose name escapes me right now wrote 'The only thing that is certain in life is death and taxes'. At least you can ring an accountant if you're not sure when your taxes are due. Unfortunately for death, we have no such assurance.

For my dear brother-in-law, Roger. Love you, miss you. R.I.P.



  1. Oh my god thats truly terrible. My condolances, what a shock :-(

  2. I am so sorry for your loss. This is so tragic. My thoughts go out to your family at this sad time. Take care all. x

  3. I'm so sorry for you loss - will be thinking of you and your family x

  4. What a shock. He was clearly troubled about something. Love and hugs to you and your sister-in-law.

  5. This is a very hard time for you and your family. It will probably take your sister-in-law a long time to come to terms with Roger's decision to end everything. My heart goes out to her and the rest of your family during this difficult time. You are brave and resilient to be able to write this post.

  6. I'm so sorry for your family's loss. Such a terrible way to die which also means so many unanswered questions. Take care.

  7. Oh I am so so sorry for your loss. I hope you and your family find some peace. Hugs.

  8. It seems all the medication these days for so many ailments...can cause what do you do?

    I am so sorry for your family and hope that there is a place where they will find a cause for such a lovely man to have such a passing.

  9. So sorry to hear about your loss...please take care...hope you and your family find some peace. x

  10. Oh. My God. I am so very sad for you and your family.
    There really are no words.....

  11. I'm so sorry for your loss. What an awful shock.
    Take care xxx

  12. my condolances to you and your husbands family i'm so sorry to hear such a tragic loss. xxxx

  13. Thank you so much for all your really kind comments, you are truly wonderful.

    I think what shocked me more was the way he died and that no-one expected it.

    However, as time ticks on, more relevations are coming out and it appears that 'Jolly Roger' was not the man we thought he was.

    So, not only do we have to deal with such a shocking death, we are now dealing with a total, utter, stranger.

    He had many fingers in many pies and was riddled with debts. Although, what the drain of money was, has yet to emerge. Whether it was gambling, loose women, drugs, another family - who the hell knows!

    My sister-in-law has discovered she does not have a penny, and the house will be repossessed as it is mortgaged to the absolute hilt. The debts are sky-high (hundreds of thousands of pounds) and Roger has left her without a home, without money, and the poor woman has just fought a bitter battle with cancer!

    I shall keep you all updated to any other events that may occur.

    Thank you all so much for being there, as another blow from Life smacks me right in the kisser.

    I love Blogland and I love you guys too.

    Thanks for being there.

    Much love RMXX

  14. Oh my god, just catching up with your blog. I'm so sorry for you and especially your sister in law. Please let us know how she is xxx.

  15. How utterly aweful. I am so sorry for your family.

  16. Oh honey - how absolutely hideous for you all. I'm so, so sorry. I do know how you feel though - my uncle (my mother's brother) threw himself out of a window of a top floor flat last year). My Mum says she will never recover. It's awful for everyone involved. Thinking of you lots and sending you a big, big kiss xx

  17. So, so sorry.
    Can't even imagine what you & your family must be going through, just such an utterly awful thing :(
    Lots of hugs to you & yours xxx

  18. That's such a tragic end, and so difficult for everyone to deal with. Some other wit said time's a great healer. In my experience, time doesn't heal - but it does make things easier to bear.

  19. How unbelievably difficult for everyone in your family. For you, your sister in law, your children. I hope you are doing ok. Lots of Love. x

  20. I want to comment but have no idea what to say. I am sorry for your loss and the loss of the man that you thought he was. That really sucks. Hope you are as well as can be expected.

  21. Absolutely tragic!! Please give Suki a big hug for us. Poor woman :-(



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